Tag: Family

The Seat Doesn’t Remember You

The Seat Doesn’t Remember You

The call wasn’t anything major. Two-car MVC, minor entrapment, a couple door pops, patients removed, scooped out and moved into the waiting ambulances. We handled it without mutual aid from neighboring counties. One volunteer fire department assisted. City and County law enforcement on scene directing traffic.

My role was pretty simple: head on a swivel, count patients, count crews, make sure nobody steps outside the traffic cones, make sure nobody drives inside them, ensure all patients get triaged and transported or get a signed refusal before we leave. Communicate with dispatch. Remain calm. Like a duck on the water—calm on the surface, paddling like mad underneath.

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How do you say Goodbye?

How do you say Goodbye?

Two weeks ago, during what I thought would be a routine telepsychiatry appointment, Monalisa told me something I wasn’t prepared to hear.

Our next appointment would be our last.

We were reviewing how the medications were doing. A recent increase in Effexor had helped resolve a brief resurgence of depressive symptoms that had begun to interfere with my quality of life. Because of the dose change, we had returned to meeting every couple of weeks.

We talked about life more broadly—how the boys were doing, how work was going, and how things felt surprisingly stable for now, even with a major move to Chicago looming a few months down the road.

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The Chair

The Chair

On Location

My first real job out of college wasn’t in medicine, or anywhere near an ambulance. It was in lighting — the kind that makes concerts glow, trade shows sparkle, and corporate galas look like the Grammys. The company was called On Location Lighting Systems, or OLLS, based out of northern Kentucky just south of Cincinnati.

That place was equal parts magic and madness. The shop always smelled like sawdust, gaff tape, and dust from road cases that had been halfway around the country. I was mostly broke — just out of school, living mostly on PB&Js, takeout food, and overtime — but for the first time, I felt like I was part of something creative. I was the shop manager, which meant I handled all the rental gear going out and coming back in, did minor repairs, kept the chaos somewhat organized, and still found myself out on shows and short tours whenever they needed an extra pair of hands.

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